How The Words We Use Impact Our Chances Of Success
Almost every night before bed I sit down and write out 10 goals for my life. These are big goals, like 20 year goals, so they are pretty lofty, but they are all very important to me and my vision of my future so I get excited each time I write them down. One of the things I’ve learned through my own experience, and through my work helping others reach their goals, is that our goals need to pack a punch and actually mean something to us for our brains to stay on track in working towards those goals (check out a recent blog post here where I talk more about why this is so important). Anyway, back to my nightly ritual. So I’m writing my goals the other day as usual and I think to myself, hmm there is something not quite right about some of these goals. A couple of my bigger goals were really vague and hard to measure. It got me thinking, how the heck am I ever going to know if I reached this goal if it’s so vague? Here’s an example of what I mean.
Some of the goals on my list are super specific and measurable, like “I employ 100 people”. That’s really specific. It’s also easy to work towards because I have a clear end goal, having 100 people working with me in my business. My brain knows how far away I am from this goal (currently I have one part time superstar of a helper; Paige you’re the best by the way), and I can lay out specific steps to get to that goal one co-worker at a time.
But some of my other goals were much harder to measure. “I am one of the top motivational speakers in the world”. What does that even mean? How will my brain know when I’ve reached that goal? How will I measure my progress, and how do I take steps to reach a goal that’s so vague?
One of the biggest reasons we fail to reach our goals is we’re too vague. New Year’s Resolutions are a great example. “This year I’m going to lose weight” or “this year I’m going to be healthier”. What does that mean? How much weight? One pound or 30? It might seem silly but it makes a huge different for our brains. Say my goals is just “to lose weight”. So I hop on the scale one day and I’m down a pound. My brain does a little happy dance and says “woohoo we did it, time to start eating chocolate again”. See the problem here? If our goal is too vague it’s easy for our brain to give up early. Or, if our goal is too vague our brain interprets that as too much work and gives up. Our brains say “be healthier, I don’t know what that means, that seems like a ton of work, maybe I’ll just give up before I fail” and you never get started.
The more specific a goal is, and the easier it is to measure success the easier it is for our brains to stay on track. Rather than “I’m going to lose weight”, we could say “I’m going to lose 5 pounds over the next three months”. Or instead of “I’m going to be healthier”, we could say “I’m going to go for a 20 minute walk every Wednesday at noon”. See the difference? The second versions are very specific, and because we can measure our success it’s easier for our brains to stay pointed in the direction of your goal without getting distracted.
Here’s how I re-wrote my goal. Instead of “I’m one of the top motivational speakers in the world” I now write “I make $10,000 each time I’m invited to speak at an event” (like I said this is a 20 year goal, currently I make nothing for speaking, no judging). Much better right? Take a look at your goals. Are they vague and almost impossible for your brain to measure? Maybe it’s time to re-write that goal so it’s as specific as possible to give your brain a game plan to stay on task.
If you want some more of my favorite tips to help your brain overcome barriers that are holding you back from your goals, click here to snag your copy of my free goal setting workbook.