92: Get Your Resolutions Back On Track

Have you fallen off track with your New Year’s Resolutions yet? If you're nodding your head don’t worry my friend, you’re not alone. Research suggests about 80% of New Year's resolutions fail by February. Those aren’t great odds.

In this episode of the Bold Life podcast I’ll share how you can avoid being a new years resolution statistic by setting goals your brain actually sticks to. Plus, one strategy to get back on track with your 2022 goals if you’ve started to slip into old habits.

What Was Your New Year's Resolution?

Whether you love them or hate them, most of us make some type of goal or resolution for the new year.

Maybe your goal for this year was related to your business or job, your health, family, finances, or whatever it is you want to achieve.

It’s December 31st and you’re starting to feel excited about the new year. Full of possibility, hope, and anticipation. You say to yourself that’s enough of these habits that are holding me back, in 2022 I’m going to lose weight, get in shape, save money, finally quit my job, get out of this relationship rut, finally make a change.

And you start the year really excited and motivated! You buy that gym membership, sign up for that class, start looking for a new job.

You’re committed, this year will be different. And you go hard at first, stay on track with those new habits, but soon that motivation starts to fizzle.

And that’s totally normal!

What Role Does Your Brain Play?

When you’re trying to change anything in your life - make a goal, achieve a resolution, start new habits or new routines - it’s important to remember that at its core your brain is designed to keep you safe.

For your brain, life is safest inside your comfort zone. Habits develop for a reason - they make life easier for your brain. Habits make it so we can do things with less effort.

Each task you do in the day takes effort, some take more energy than other tasks. Driving to work is easy peasy, we’ve all gone into auto pilot and arrived at work, and you can’t remember the drive there, hoping you stopped at all the lights. That’s normal.

Because your brain has driven to work so many times it’s become a routine you don’t need to think about. You get in your car, start it up, and your brain takes you on the route to work with minimal effort.

But what if there’s construction and you’re rerouted and all of a sudden turning down radio to focus and get to work feeling stressed and tired already. 

Your brain develops habits to make life easier, to be more efficient, and to save you energy. Because your brain runs on energy - burns calories, and it wants to conserve that energy.

Change takes energy - that’s why taking new route to work is harder and tires you out. Why new years resolutions are hard to stick to, even if you really want to reach that goal and feel super motivated this year.

You start that new habit, whether it’s exercising regularly, or working on a big project in your business but pretty quickly your brain says this is so much work. All this energy is being put into the new habit, going to gym, budgeting, looking for new jobs, whatever the new habit is.

And quickly your brain is going to pull you back into old habits.

It’s easier to go home and sit on couch rather than go to gym, easier to go back to having a massive to-do list and juggling a million balls rather than focusing one task at a time and setting boundaries with work. Your brain wants to save energy.

So it pulls you off track back into old behaviours and routines. Because that’s easier and requires less energy for your brain. 

How Do You Set Your Goals?

Part of the reason goals and resolution are so hard for our brain is we write them in a way that’s not easy to stick to. We often set goals that are vague and not specific, like “I’m going to get in shape this year”.

Then your brain says…

“What does that mean?… Lose so much weight, fit in certain clothes, how are we going to do that? Ugh this is so much work, so much effort, let’s just say in our jammies and binge a season of iZombie on Netflix!” (Which, by the way, I’m watching right now. Perfect mix of campy horror, witty banter, and detective mystery that I like in my tv).

When we make these vague goals that are hard to stick to, your brain wants to quit.

Or we set goals that way out there - that are unachievable. I'm all for big goals and dreams, but when we set big goals they need to be step by step.

It’s not reasonable to tell your brain I'm going to go from never working out to exercising every day this year. That much change takes a ton of energy and it’s not sustainable.

Your brain’s going to push back against these goals - they’re too much work, take to much energy, and your brain doesn't like that.

SMART goals

The Solution - Ever heard of smart goals?

Sounds cheesy like some acronym your boss made up just to be catchy (I am not a fan of acronyms, it was one of my least favorite parts of working for years in public health - acronyms for everything - but the science behind SMART goals is sound). Let me explain how SMART goals work. 

S - stands for specific - you want your goals to be as specific as possible. This makes it way easier for your brain.

Instead of “I'm going to save money this year”, a more specific goal is - “I'm going to put a dollar in a jar every day and save that money as an emergency fund.” This specific goal requires less effort for your brain.

Your brain doesn’t have to figure out what save money means. It has a specific goal it can work towards. This takes less resources and energy, so you’re more likely to succeed.

M - measurable. Remember, your brain is lazy by default. It wants to save energy. If your brain can’t tell if it’s winning or not when it comes to your goals, it’s going to give up.

Get in shape is a great example - your brain can say “Well, I went for a walk today, that must be good enough” and gives up.

Going to walk every day for 20 minutes at lunch is a more measurable goal. It gives your brain defined goal, so you know if you’re on track, and you're not spending energy to figure out if your goal is working 

A - in SMART goals refers to goals as being achievable or attainable. Let’s go back to that goal of working out every day.

But right now I’m a couch potato who thinks running is a method of torture (which I do, running is not my thing and would not be an easy choice for my brain when it comes to exercise).

Big goals are great, but if too far in the future your brain loses motivation, and it takes energy to maintain momentum. Your brain doesn’t want to do it, so it starts to pull you back into old habits.

Make sure your goal or resolution is something that starts small - I recommend baby steps to any new habit. Each step seems small but builds momentum for brain. Instead of run every day, a more achievable goal to start with would be to go for a walk once a week.

I know it’s frustrating to start small (our brains also want all the success right now) but this is a better long-term strategy and you’re less likely to become a new year’s resolution statistic if you pick achievable goals.

R - relevant. A goal that matters to you. If my boss says she wants me to sign 10 new clients this quarter, but I want to focus on clients we have, then it’s not a great goal for my brain.

Goals mean more if they’re personal and important to you (not from somewhere else). Your brain finds it easier to stick to goals if they have to do with something really important to you (that’s extra motivation for your brain to do the hard thing).

Maybe saving money is too vague for you to stick to - but saving $1000 to take kids on vacation has more meaning and relevance, so it’s going to be an easier and more achievable goal for your brain.

Pick a goal that’s relevant to your life. That has meaning and that you actually want to achieved. You’re brain will spend less energy keeping you on track.

T - And finally the T in SMART goals means make your goals timely. Set a time limit. Lots of resolutions have no end - get in better shape- that’s a lifelong goal, a great one, but easy for your brain to lose focus.

I’m going to walk at noon on Mondays, or I'm going to put a dollar in my savings jar every time I get home from work, or I’m going to delegate 5 things off my to-do list by Friday are easier for your brain to stick to because they have a defined end. A time limit. 

When we write our goals in a way that takes less effort for your brain, that saves energy and makes you more likely to succeed.

Bonus Tip

Take that resolution you set and break it down into super small chunks or steps. Remember, change is hard for our brains.

So when we set goals or try to start a new healthy habit your brain is going to push back. Starting super small is a great way to build momentum. I like to start with something I can do in 5-10 minutes, like go for a quick walk if my goals are around physical activity, or read for 10 minutes every night for a week.

Really small goals like this work because specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and timely. And your brain loves succeeding - small wins make you want to keep going. It feels good to make progress right?

But it’s frustrating to lose momentum. You set a resolution of working out, but you stop going to the gym, and you feel bad and guilty, which makes you less likely to go back. Small wins build momentum, stop procrastination, and help you stay on track with your goals.

If you’ve fallen off track with your new year’s resolution, take that resolution and break it down into bite size chunks. Pick one you can do in 5-10 minutes, and start with that task until it’s become a habit, then move on to the next step. 

you got this!

Your brain’s primary goal is to conserve energy - it does this by creating habits and routines to make your life easier. Change those habits and you burn a lot of energy. Your brain doesn’t like that - that’s why goals and resolutions are so hard to stick to.

By focusing on goals that are super specific, and allow you to take a baby step approach to build momentum, your brain is less likely to push back and keep you on the couch, and more likely to learn that new habit you’re trying to achieve.

Show Highlights

[01:29] Whether you love them or hate them, most of us set goals for the year.

[02:41] Remember, your brain is designed to keep you safe and in your comfort zone.

[04:54] Goals and resolutions are so hard to stick with because of how we write them.

[06:06] Have you heard of S.M.A.R.T. goals?

[06:27] The “S” stands for specific.

[07:04] “M” stands for measurable.

[07:40] The “A” stands for achievable or attainable.

[08:44] “R” stands for relevant.

[09:40] The “T” stands for timely, so set a time limit.

[10:17] Take the resolution you set and break it down into super small steps.

[12:10] A quick review of all the information and tips in this episode.